PASSION

I never realized the importance of this word or rather the perfect part it plays in my life each single day until a while back. To be precise, i never got the impetus to sit down to dissect the word to its subtleties in any of my contemplative modes until some one as a miracle happened to seep into my mind, removed the blindfold and opened my eyes to the ever inspiring, beautiful haven hidden in a poorly lit corner of my mind.

It so happens sometimes right ? My mom used to tell me when i sit dejected and brooding over something that ' Are you ever going to realize your worth ?!! ' . Well i believe many would have the same story to say. Maybe the character asking the question would be different. Sometimes it turns out that you need some one else to enlighten you on yourself. Can be your mother, can be your father, siblings or even your love, or sometimes a complete stranger !.

It did for me. I happened to realise like some smoke screen has been erased from my vision that being passionate doesnt narrow down to just yelling at the top of your mind's voice and daring any challenge that comes your way. On the other hand it happens to be more about dedicating your whole heart to things you love. Its more about making your days meaningful. I mean we maynot be able to live our days like a protagonist of some movie whom as we see would be so pursuing a Happening life !! Well yea maybe for some but not for all. For people like me, its about relishing each asset i'm blessed with , each smile that makes my day. I believe only some one who finds a small heaven in the blessings they are so fortunately laden with, can succeed in striving for more .

you might find this silly ! But i realised these days that , i find myself pretty much in love with certain things the more i do it, i love certain movies the more i watch it and i love certain songs the more i listen to it. Is it coz they are hopelessly addictive ? Or is it coz i'm passionate towards them ? Either way right ? Like things that are hopelessly addictive can make us passionate towards them and things we are passionate about can turn out hopelessly addictive !!

well guess that explains it ! And if you find yourself happy doing something, just love it to the core !! Be it loving some one or loving something ! If you have a hobby be passionate about it . If you feel you wanna do more with your days , why hesitate ?! Or is it like oh i'm too weak to survive a chance or i'm gonna discard the idea sooner or later anyway ? Well you never know unless you try !! May be that would be one of the best decisions of your life ! :)

Conviction and Faith in what you love makes you love them more. If you are some one passionate, well i can say without a tad of doubt that you have the most exciting life infront of you ! :) And if you are some one who wants to be one, all i can say is that . . Its never Late !! :)

MY DIARY :) :)

To start off , lemme first brief you on what actually ignited my mind into bringing out this note :p .well its that I happened to flip through the pages of my old diary ( some 6 yrs back ) a while back. And lemme add this too that i'm still not quite over the myriad of emotions it sent me through ! I mean , God ! Can anything be more embarassing than to read yourself lamenting and crying your heart out there for the silliest of things and feeling desperate !

I know for certain that if I sit down to write my diary this very moment , Chances are cent percent that I would come up with the whackiest of the thoughts in between depicting the incidents of the day :p. So that makes it even. Lets not make a fuss about all those crazy stuffs !

Now going through what i'd jotted down over the days did help me hark back some precious moments . And I found myself smiling , laughing , blushing , wondering and they even left me in tatters at some points , not the least exaggerating . The sentences became poignant at times and wicked at other times . And in short it was pretty much an enticing journey to the past for I could view the me of yester years as easy as that !

And the icing on the cake which made me go ROFL ? Well the diction and my style of depiction itself ! Take for eg : one incident when me and my parents were going on a trip to the beach. And according to the diary It seems i was not the least in the mood for a trip. And the exact line goes as :

' My mind was swirling in joy but at the same time my head was spinning in the excruciating pain bogging me down ! '

Now what the heck is tht !! :p I know its against my morale to make fun of myself , but lemme just let it pass this one time ;)

Nonetheless one's personal diary is some what like the mirror image of one's mind. It perfectly captures the nook and corner of your thought field and you find the emotions you never thought existed gushing out in a fray. Writing down consoles you at times , helps you take decisions at times ( not that thats the only way ) , and even gives colourful meaning to the tiniest of achievements like the bliss you experience while copying down the very last page of your SPM record !

It comes without say people change . Their concepts change over the years. The blank space in the diary captures your purview at the moment you were writing them down. You wont be thinking the same way the very next moment , or days after having written down something. It sure gives me an idea about how I used to appoach things and how my graph went after that. Here one never has to fake emotions or hide one's weaknessess behind the mask of boldness as we are forced to many a times . I should say that applies to writing down your mind in anyway - say a blog , a poem or just thoughts on a scrap of paper.

Nevertheless , by opening up that way has played their part in aiding me deal many not so pleasant situations thrown my way.

For me writing my diary is more or less a venture albeit a blissful one. For my one day doesnt get over in one page however hard I try. But then thats just me being me - never a girl of less words :). So the core . . juggling words is what I do in my diary . . And as to how I do that . . Well did I tell you that

' Trespassers will be strictly prosecuted ' !! :p

P.s : its likely that you might be able to relate to this post more if you have the habit of writing a diary yourself .

Attitude Huh :D !!

   

                                                  The question is familiar - Is there anyone out there whose days ( sometime or the other ) dont seem to be darkened by the brunt of something awful from the past . Well, ofcourse it depends on how ' kick-ass ' the trouble you landed in was ! Most would say yes . Sometimes we find ourselves wondering how silly its on our part to carry the hell with us  when time is supposed to heal even the deepest of the wounds. But then some scars hurt and they hurt a lot. 


                                              Many amongst  would be having a face ( read notorious one ) hidden in the corners of our minds who brings more or less the picture of a demon well . . Carrying a mighty Screw in their hands !! How we wish we could just go around kicking those dumb asses and just get away with it in the real world ! I wouldnt mind being a Charlie's Angel myself ! If only it was as easy as i put it .


                                               Amidst fallacies and false accusations we tread, some succumb, a few remain stone faced. As i said earlier pretty much weighs on the devil we are talking about here as well as the kinda person we are. Its no surprise we fail miserably to wrench free from something as torturing as this even when our minds shouldnt be enjoying it the least ! But we move on...these surface a second time . . We move on. . A third time. . We move on . . Umpteen number of times . . We move on. 


                                         For its not in your hands sometimes to control things . Its not in your hands to rein over people's thoughts . But its definitely in our hands to pull out the nerves to show them that you dont care . And its definitely in our limits to show them how happy , how unshaken you are after all those hell they pushed you through !

                                          The grit matters and it matters damn good for its what makes you take the sweetest revenge even if its for a moment. .even if we wont be knowing for sure what they feel..Agree it or not But the rush that fills your mind must sure make you proud of what you have made of yourself.. And remember for many it happens to be from the trashes stinking the worst !